Navigating fertility challenges

From someone who has lived mental health and also having worked in the area & completed mental health first aid training, I believe when it comes to infertility and IVF, we may not realise the impact it’s having on our mental health and our state of mind. We may be busy with work, appointments, scans, hormone treatments, social commitments etc and not realise the importance of protecting and preserving our mental health while going through such life changing events.

There is so much uncertainty and unknown in the navigation process of IVF and infertility that anxiety and or depression can be common emotions that may arise throughout the process. It’s important to have ‘tools in your toolbox’ to support and protect your health along the way.

I’d like to share some strategies that I’ve learnt & implemented along my journey that has helped me to stay mentally well while exploring my infertility over the years.

• Prioritising sleep- this may seem obvious but it’s so vital in our fertility journey both for your mental & physical health and especially for IVF and egg quality. 8-9 hours a night is proven to support your health and fertility and let’s be honest we feel great after a good nights rest. Even a short nap in the afternoons if you get time can help revitalise you and your wellbeing.
• Meditation & mindfulness- I completed an 8 week course in mindfulness and it changed my life for the better. Even 5 minutes of meditation first thing in the mornings can change the course of your day and how you deal with any challenges the day may bring. I use the app Insight Timer, it’s wonderful and has endless short and long meditations for anyone. You can search ‘fertility meditations’ or ‘pregnancy meditations’ and there’s options for everyone. If your new to meditation, you can try the apps Smiling Mind or Headspace but Insight timer is still beginner friendly and easy to use. Mindfulness is about attention and awareness, it helps you to feel more grounded and more accepting and to approach your difficulties with a sense of warmth and curiosity. It’s about staying present and using your senses such as smell to stay in the moment, calm your mind and help you let go of unwanted emotions or feelings. There’s a good book by Mark Williams and Danny Penman called Mindfulness, a practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world. It also comes with a free cd of guided meditations. Practicing mindfulness everyday does wonders for anxiety and stress. If you can try stay present instead of thinking ahead or dwelling on the past you can stay calm, less stressed and life will simply flow better. Tap into your senses and focus on the sensations of breathing noticing your inward and outward breath.
• Nature and walking- walking is a great mood booster and stress reliever. It’s free and you can go solo or with a friend/fur baby. Getting out in nature whether it be a bush walk or a beach stroll free’s the mind and makes us feel good. I walk 45 minutes every morning early down at my local beach. The fresh salty air, the blue clear ocean and the ‘good mornings’ with the locals helps me feel connected to my community, stay present and sets me up for a more positive day. If you’re able, a swim in the ocean or even a cold plunge or cold shower first thing in the morning, cold water exposure is incredible for mental health as well as your physical health. I recommend reading the book The Wim Hof method it’s very insightful on the benefits of exposure to the elements of cold, breathing and mindset. Start with 30 seconds of cold water in the shower each morning, fully immerse yourself under the cold water or bath and then build up as you become able to withstand longer periods of cold water.
• Exercise like yoga or Pilates- I do a Yin yoga class every week and it helps me to relax while also moving my body. Exercise is great for fertility purposes but also wonderful for your mental health. You can get free yoga sessions on youtube including yoga for fertility.
• Healthy food healthy mind- prioritising good healthy food not only supports your mental health but hugely contributes to your fertility. I’m about to start a certificate in nutrition at a university in Australia so will do a separate blog on this however eating a whole foods Mediterranean style diet full of good healthy fats, like avocado, omega 3’s like salmon and walnuts, high fibre and protein is proven to support fertility and good mental health. Stay tuned for more info on nutrition and fertility.
• Practicing gratitude and goal setting. Every evening in the shower I think of 3 things I’m grateful for from that day. It helps to shift my mindset into a positive one and helps me focus on the good in the day rather than the negatives. Journalling gratitude is amazing too reminding yourself there’s often always something to be grateful for even if you’re going through a tough time. Setting small goals for your week or month ahead keeps you motivated and organised in your daily life. Reflecting on these goals as they’re achieved gives you a sense of purpose and personal achievement as well as feeling proud of yourself.
• Practice self compassion & kindness- Be kind to yourself the way you would a friend or family member if they were going through a challenging time in their life. Go easy on yourself and allow those uneasy feelings to pass, feel them, acknowledge them and let them pass. Take time out for you and speak kindly to yourself in a non judgmental way. You’re allowed to feel sad or angry, but know these feelings are temporary, give yourself time to heal. Be kind to others also, random acts of kindness make us feel good and helps someone else in need. A compliment to a stranger, offering a homeless person some food and comfort or offering your seat up on a bus or train. We feel a sense of satisfaction and a positive mind shift.
• Do something pleasurable and fun. Let’s be honest IVf is not usually fun so break up your week with a fun activity with your partner or friends. Do something you enjoy that lifts you up and distracts you from the stress of IVF and infertility. Be spontaneous and adventurous whether it be a hike, a day trip somewhere or trying a new hobby. It might even be reading a new book or learning a new skill like surfing or baking.

I hope this helps you on your journey to stay mentally healthy while enduring IVF or infertility. Most IVF clinics offer free counselling services with a professional which I highly recommend you seek if you’re struggling mentally or just want to talk to someone outside of your circle.

Sending love & best wishes your way! Next blog coming soon. Chloe xo